I'm only 6 weeks and 1 day, but that feels like a milestone in itself. There's a little baby in there, hopefully growing big and strong and smart! I also have a new ultrasound scheduled and it is much sooner than the 12 week one, which I recall thinking was a bit late. As it happens, that's true! The doctor I saw to confirm my pregnancy wasn't my family doctor - I went in for a brief walk in to get this sorted - and she neglected to give me the requisition for that scan.
Actually, she missed out on a lot of information, which made me extremely grateful for my family doctor and her beautiful brain.
I will have an ultrasound in a little over two weeks, and that is my dating scan. This scan is important! It will tell me how the baby is and when we're due, but will also be an insight into the baby's overall health. I have my bloodwork and prenatal testing that same week, so this will be the week in which I can hopefully breathe a big sigh of relief.
This scan is where, God willing, I see that little beating heart. Where I see if that little bean is doing okay.
Full disclosure here: the anxiety right now is REAL. I don't remember if I was this anxious in my last pregnancy, but I'm guessing I wasn't. And I'm guessing all this anxiety is thanks to being a "mature" mother, because wow, do they ever shove it down your throat that your baby could have all kinds of problems: down syndrome. Abnormalities. Miscarriage. Still birth. The horror!
I'm trying to keep my stress levels down, trying not to think of all the what-ifs, but OH. MYLANTA. The anxiety is real. It really is.
I really just need a doctor to walk in right now with a nice thin file and say, your baby is looking great, we aren't worried about a thing! Could a doctor just please go ahead and do that?
I wonder if I had been upfront about just how anxious I am, my doctor would have suggested a placating ultrasound to pre-date my dating ultrasound? Is there such a thing as a scan to placate an excessively nervous mom-to-be??
Breathe, Lauren. Breathe. In a few weeks, you'll have all the information and you will be able to see a less fuzzy future. I'm hopeful, I really am, because my first pregnancy was so perfect, and my daughter is so perfect, so hopefully I'll be as lucky. Never would there ever be a more grateful Mommy.
How far along?: 6 weeks
Baby is the size of a(n): Jelly Belly
Total weight gain/loss: Still sitting at the same weight. It fluctuates up and down by about 3 lbs.
The Bump: None yet, a lot more bloating. I'm ready for my real bump, especially since this one has been broken in already. Bring it baby!
Symptoms/How I'm feeling: Still no morning sickness, so yay! Boobs are still sore, but not as bad. Or maybe I'm just getting used to them. Other than that I am TIIIIRRRREEEED.
Food Cravings/Aversions: Fruit. Nothing unhealthy or excessive. Had a sudden and alarming craving for wine (which I gave up for life about 4 months ago. So that was interesting.)
Sleep: Ah-bys-mal. Like really, really bad.
Weddings Rings On or Off: On. I hope to keep them on this time around but we'll see.
Exercise: Walking. Walking all the time - I have a newfound appreciation for enjoyable exercise that doesn't make me want to throat punch people, and that's basically walking and yoga. Next week our lives return to normal, so I may start doing little 20 minute yoga sessions with Morgan in the mornings.
Any Names Picked Out Yet: Yes. Not telling.
Gender: I kinda really hope it's a girl, for mostly practical reasons. But either way, I'm happy with a healthy, happy baby!
Movement: None, but that would be weird. I'm feeling the odd twinge but it's normal.
Maternity Clothes: None yet.
Labor Signs: None.
What I miss: I miss not being worried all the damn time!
Best Moment of the Week: Uhhhhh I dunno. It's been a busy week and I haven't had much down time...
What I’m excited about/looking forward to: my appointments... getting to see baby and mostly to see that everything is A-Okay. I won't be able to sleep until then. < still this. So much this. Just a couple more weeks! Eeek!
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